Metal Sludge The Power and the Glory
CAPTURES FOR NOVEMBER!
A capture with a few random Sludge hotties and myself, the always studly bastard boy floyd!
Whoooooooooooooooooo!
Time once again for Sludge Captures! You know what Sludge Captures are by now, right? Sure you do! If you were about to say, “Sludge Captures are where Sludgeaholics all over the world put on some Sludgendise and get pictures taken with current and trendy rock stars, up and coming rock stars, washed-up rock stars, B- and C-list celebrities, and anyone else who they can convince to get their photo taken with them,” well, you would be absolutely right!
Let’s get the ball rolling with the chick who’s turning out to be the Queen of All Captures, Miss Suzie from K-Zoo! Here she is to start us off with some recent captures of Drowning Pool and King’s X.
Suzie with Drowning Pool’s singer Jason “Gong” Jones
Drowning Pool’s guitar player C.J. Pierce with Suzie
With bassist Stevie Benton
With King’s X singer/bassist Doug Pinnick
With Jerry Gaskill and Ty Tabor of King’s X
About these next few, Suzie writes: “Lola Ray opened for Good Charlotte and Sum 41 tonight (11/10) in Grand Rapids. Ended up hanging out with Lola Ray (awesome band!) James (suit and tie) Alex and John from Lola Ray pictured.”
Who the fuck is Lola Ray? I thought that was the singer for the Kinks, but I guess I’m wrong. I asked around at the Metal Sludge offices and nobody had any idea who Lola Ray was, but we’re down with just about anyone Suzie captures, so we’ll take her word that they’re relevant. Here they are.
Suzie with James from Lola Ray
Suzie and Lola Ray’s Alex
Suzie and some guy named John
Here’s some captures of that new band Naked Beggars, featuring Cinderella’s Jeff LaBar and Eric Brittingham, along with Eric’s wife Inga. Whoooooooooooooooooo!
Yo floyd Willy Wonkastein here with some captures from St. Louis. They came from the packed Naked Beggars show at Generations night club. Nearly 25% of those in attendance were sportin sludge. That being said, there were only 30-40 people there.
Me, Tinalu, Polexxia (in from Utah) and some other dude who doesn’t post were sportin the sludgendise. Here are the pics.
Thank you,
Willy Wonkastein
Polexxia, Tina Lu, and Willy Wonkenstiein with Inga Brittingham
Polexxia, Tina Lu, and Willy with Eric Brittingham and some other guy
Nice to see fomer Sludgettes of the Month Tina Lu and Polexxia (a.k.a. Marie Braden) gracing our Captures page! But just who is in the hell is that ‘other guy’ with Willy and the girls? Well, it’s none other than Allen Hammer from St. Louis!! “Who the fuck is that,” you ask? Beats the shit out of us, but he sent us in the following capture on his own:
Hello here is a pic with me and Jeff LaBar and Eric Brittingham from a Naked Beggars show in St Louis Mo this past Sep at Generations! Thank you and love the site!!
Allen Hanner
St Louis Mo
Allen with Eric Brittingham and Jeff LaBar
Here’s the first Anthrax capture we’ve had since… well, since last month. Is it Scott Ian? No. Is it John Bush? No. It’s none other than Anthrax lead guitarsist Rob Caggiano! You just can’t have enough captures with Rob. Here he is now, captured by a Sludgette in quiet and tranquil New York City.
Hey MS..
i’m IntergalacticSpaceHussie from the boards. I just remembered i had this picture with Rob Caggiano from Anthrax.. it’s on the ho board but anyway…
It was outside the Beacon Theater Dio/Anthrax show last month. Rob’s a sweet guy!
Rob Caggiano and IntergalacticSpaceHussie
Next up is the return of September 2002 Sludgeaholic of the Month Tony the Toker! Tony’s captured rock stars, porn stars, wrestling stars, and now he’s captured his local TV anchorwoman! Do we care? Not really, but we back Tony the Toker and all his endeavors, so here’s his latest capture.
Here I am at the Scorpions/Tesla concert with news anchor Shauna Parsons from the local Fox News Channel. What a piece of ass!
www.kptv.com/Global/category.asp?C=31761
Tony the Toker with that Shauna chick
Now here’s a whole bunch of Sludge Captures that, for one reason or another, were never sent in to Metal Sludge. The Sludgeaholics who got these pics had been saving them up for years, and have now sent them to us in one big batch. It’s sort of like walking into a time warp! Let’s check them out.
Your latest batch of captures motivated me to find all my captures I never have gotten around to sending to Metal Sludge.
Two are after a Trans-Siberian Orchestra show a couple of years ago in Houston. My husband, Jerry, and I are both sludgaholics. In one picture we are with Mr. & Mrs. Al Pitrelli. Al wasn’t smiling because he had braces.
The other picture is us with Angus Clark, a guitar player, and Steve, who was the drummer that year.
I’ve also included pictures of us taken with Ripper Owens after a Priest show in Houston last year.
There’s 3 from a Broken Teeth show in Houston, probably in late 2002. I just love Jason McMaster!
Now that I finally got around to sending all these, I can start working on a new batch!
Have a nice day!
MetalMama
“Metal Mama” Laura with Mr. and Mrs. Al Pitrelli and Laura’s husband Jerry, who looks a little too happy for a guy not wearing Sludgendise.
Steve and Angus from Trans Siberian Orchestra with Laura and Jerrry, who still isn’t wearing Sludgendise.
Jerry’s wearing Sludgendise, but what happened to Laura’s? Anyway, Jerry’s drinking some heavy duty extra stout draught and hanging with Jason McMaster from Broken Teeth, also of Dangerous Toys fame!
Jerry and Laura with Broken Teeth guitarist Paul Lidel, also of Dirty Looks fame!
With Broken Teeth drummer Bruce Rivers, also of… well, actually, we don’t know who the fuck that is.
Ripper Owens with Laura the MetalMama!
Ripper looks bedazzled by Jerry’s mastery of the metal-face.
Time for a walk down memory lane! This next set of Steve and Laura’s captures aren’t very timely, but here they are for old times’ sake. They’re from long, long ago, back from the MSX 2003 tour!
Here we are at the Metal Sludge Extravanganza in San Antonio on July 20, 2003. All the guys in Pretty Boy Floyd were pretty friendly, and Brent Muscat was a sweetheart!
Jerry and Laura with Pretty Boy Floyd’s Steve “Sex” Summers
With the one and only Brent Muscat from Faster Pussycat!
Laura with Stevie Ray Vaughn! Hey, wait a minute…
That’s not really Stevie Ray Vaughn! What the hell, guys?
Those last two captures seem like something Smilin’ Mike would try to pull, but Steve and Laura sent in so many relevant captures that we decided to let those slide.
Speaking of Smilin’ Mike, let’s check out his latest attempts at getting real Sludge Captures.
Uh, OK…
Smilin’ Mike e-mailed us and said he got a capture with an Eagle. Now, we would’ve accepted a picture of Don Henley, Glenn Frey, or Joe Walsh. Shit, we’d even accept a capture with Randy Meisner of all people! But this? This doesn’t quite cut the mustard.
Why is Smilin’ Mike hanging out at the playground, anyway? That’s kind of creepy. Good thing it’s dark out. Any other time of day, and he would’ve scared all the little kids away. Try again, Smilin’ Mike.
OK, quit fucking clowning around.
Smilin’ Mike e-mailed us and said he attached a capture with ‘Ronald.’ We weren’t sure who Ronald was. There are plenty of obscure ‘Ronalds,’ ‘Ron’s,’ ‘Ronnies’ and ‘Ronbo’s’ out there. Like Ronnie Atkins, the singer from Pretty Maids, or Ronnie LeTekro, the guitarist from TNT. Perhaps singer Ron Young from Little Caesar, or even Bad Ronbo Dwarf from the Killer Dwarfs! But none of those guys appeared in Smilin’ Mike’s captures. Instead, we got this. Nope! Let’s see what else you got, Smilin Mike.
We weren’t sure what this was all about, so we asked Smilin’ Mike what he was trying to pull here. Here was his reply:
This is a pic at my friends house… Notice the 3 or 4 “Orbs” in the picture, meaning the little white circles over my head… Some people say they are ghosts/spirits whatever ya wanna call em caught on film… Funny thing is, sometimes we hear weird shit like loud bangs and doors creaking, etc and my friend lives alone in the house… Pretty freaky…
OK, who are we to say ghosts are real or not. I’ve actually never seen one, though Taime Downe kind of looks like a ghost. Now, if there were an actual materialized spirit of someone, like, let’s say, Jerry Garcia, or Wendy O. Williams, or Kurt Cobain, or someone like that, we still would probably not have counted it, but it would have been better than random floating ‘orbs.’ What the fuck, Smilin’ Mike? We told you last month we want actual living, breathing, human beings in your Sludge Captures! With the way his latest batch of captures are going, I can hardly wait to see what’s next.
Oh, for Pete’s sake.
Last month, didn’t we tell Smilin’ Mike not to put himself in danger by getting captures with wild animals? Smilin’ Mike e-mailed us and said he got a capture with ‘Rat.’ We thought that was an honest typo and mayebe he meant ‘Ratt,’ so we were expecting a capture with Warren DeMartini, Stephen Pearcy, the Blotz, Juan Croucier, or even Jizzy Pearl. But did we get that? Fuck no! We’d have accepted a photo with any one of the 50-or-so people who have played in Ratt over the years. Even Robbie Crane. Did you hear that? Robbie fucking Crane would count as a Sludge Capture! Instead, Smilin’ Mike fished out a live rat from the gutter, putting himself in jeopardy just for the sake of a capture that DOESN’T EVEN COUNT!
That rat looks rabid too! Put that fucker down, Smilin’ Mike, before it gnaws off your metal-face! Next…
Well, this is right for the season, but it’s not a ‘Sludge Capture.’
To count, it has to be with some sort of ‘rock star,’ celebrity, or other semi-famous person, no matter how washed up they are. Tom Araya would count. Tom Keiffer would count. Fuck, even Tom Arnold would count! But Tom Turkey? Doesn’t work for us. How about Tommy Tutone, Tommy Hilfiger, or friggin’ Tommy Lee! Now any of those would be a Sludge Capture! Try one more time, Smilin’ Mike.
No no no no nooooooooooooo, Smilin’ Mike! NO!
This is about the closest thing to a Sludge Capture that Smilin’ Mikes ever gotten. Here he is holding a copy of Tommy Lee’s new book “Tommyland.” Now, it would be cool if Smilin’ Mike were actually standing next to the real Tommy Lee! He could be holding Tommy’s ball-bag for all we care. Just as long as Tommy’s in the picture and Smilin’ Mike’s wearing some Sludgendise. Now THAT would be a true Sludge Capture!
Will Smilin’ Mike ever get a real Sludge Capture? Fucked if we know. We’re kind of at our wit’s end with him, so he’d better pull it off soon or else!
Think YOU can do better? Then give it a try and show everyone how it’s done! Here’s what you do:
-
Go to our all new Metal Sludge Sludgendise Store and grab yourself some swag! Even a capture with our new baseball caps and beanie hats would count, so whip out your plastic and make it happen!
- Go out to shows, bars, clubs and events where you’ll be able to find random rock stars, celebrities, or any other Sludge-worthy person, and get a photo with them. Hang out after your favorite band’s gig for their meet-and-greet. Go wait by their tour bus. Blow a roadie! We don’t care. Just get the fucking photo.
- Send the picture(s) to us! If you have a digital camera, it’s easy! Just attach your pic(s) to an email and send it to metalsludge@metalsludge.tv. Or get your film developed, scan in the pictures, and e-mail us your scans. Don’t worry if you’re not a master of Desktop Publishing. Our graphic design wizards will crop, edit, and resize your pics so they suit our own fucking needs.
- Or, if scanning photos is too technologically challenging for you, just stuff the prints in an envelope and send them to one of our P.O. Boxes! We’ll do the hard work for you. But make sure you get duplicates if you want your own copies. Don’t ask us to send your damned pictures back to you when we’re done or anything shifty like that. We’ll do all we can to share your Sludge Captures with the world, but don’t push your luck, Fuckwit.
That’s all the time for Sludge Captures we have for this month! Check back in December to see more Sludgeaholics wearing Sludgendise and bothering all kinds of Sludge-worthy celebrities for their photo.
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