SEND US YOUR SHIT!

Well, not really…

Yeah, we don’t want your feces, but we want you all to know that Metal Sludge has a P.O. Box, so that means you can send us whatever you want. Cash, gifts, porn, keys to new cars, pictures of your mom’s ass, pictures of your boyfriend in panties and a bra, death threats, credit cards, videos of you and your sister knocking boots, videos of you sucking off your dog, letter bombs, short bald midget guys, magazines, CDs, tapes, beer, free software, posters, used breast implants, DVDs, used tampons, whatever the fuck you want!

Remember, there are several contributors, so if you send ‘1’ CD your chances of getting plugged, promoted, or pulverised drops drastically. Send a few to both addresses and we’ll let the staff sort it out. So here they are, jello tits. Write these down:

LOCAL BAND CD REVIEWS!
We’ve also been asked more times than Donna Anderson has been on her back for us to review CDs from unsigned bands. People email us and say, “I’m in a local band, blah blah blah, and I want to suck your nuts if you review our shit.” Well, Metal Sludge will now do that! So spread the word! If your in an unsigned band, or if your in a signed band, send us a promo package! We want CDs, 8 x 10s of your goofy asses, bio’s, all that shit. We’ll start a section for unsigned bands where we will review your stuff and probably rip you to shreads. We’ll review your CD, your “look”, your bio, and then tell you your chances of getting a record deal. We’ll give your band a complete and total review. But chances are, even if we rip the hell out of your CD, you still get a ton of exposure and Warner Brothers or Atlantic will sign you to a huge deal and you’ll go out on tour with the Backstreet Boys and play in front of millions each night! So how can you go wrong? Let us know if your going to send us something so we can have bastard boy floyd sit in the parking lot of the post office in his trailer and wait for your package to arrive. Trust me, he ain’t got nothing better to do.

Don’t be a stupid ass, make sure you address it to METAL SLUDGE, mkay?  You can put c/o underneath that, but just make sure it’s at least has Metal Sludge or one of our names on your package. We don’t want any of our free shit getting lost!

NEW RULES:

If you are going to send us a CD, you HAVE to send us more than one copy.  If you send us one copy, we AIN’T reviewing it.   We’ll throw it in the trash.  There are at least 6 of us at this site, and we are spread out all across the US.  Sharing one CD with 6 or so people ain’t happening.  The minimum number of CDs we need is 2!!  You don’t send one CD to Atlantic Records!  You at least send a few.  Record labels want more than one CD, and so do we!  

Also, when you send us something, let us know what the fuck you want us to do with it. For example, if you want us to review it, address it to:

Metal Sludge
c/o Review My Shizznit

Or include a letter or something so we know what to do with it.

For any advertising inquires, please e-mail:

metalsludge@metalsludge.tv

advertising@metalsludge.tv

For all other business-related inquiries, please e-mail:

businessaffairs@metalsludge.tv