WHO’S ON FIRST
Quiet Riot’s singer quits, what’s his Jizz rejoins and I don’t know who’s next

Metal Sludge — Clearly this has surpassed the; “Are you fucking kidding me” stage and it’s now just common place.

The 80’s rock world is kinda like Wal-Mart, only with musicians instead of stock boys or sales clerks.

“Hey Bob, Jim won’t make it, he’s got a sore throat” tells a random co-worker to another, at any old workplace in the USA.

The names change, and the “sore throat” can be a swapped out with a “flat tire”, or the person having diarrhea or a hang-over.

Or maybe, a more private and personal matter.

And no, Wal-Mart is not referencing Quiet Riot, L.A. Guns, or Ratt, but rather… the whole kit and caboodle.

Which while we’re there, wtf does kit and caboodle mean anyway?

A quick glance at my google bar and it appears to mean: “A collection of things.”

Kind of like a collection of songs, singers, guitarists, roadies or even managers.

Back to the important stuff…

This article isn’t really about anyone in particular, but it should be noted that James Durbin has left Quiet Riot.

Who knows why, and really… let’s be honest – who cares.

No dis to James Durbin, but it’s like… will anyone lose sleep over this?

Sure, there will be some fans crying; “But he’s so good” while others will be happy he’s moved on.

Let’s be real, an American Idol contestant joining a Heavy Metal band was doomed from the start.

Heck, Durbin was born in 1989, and ironically, Kevin Dubrow the band’s face and voice wasn’t even in the band that same year.

Although Durbin can sing his ass off – so could that Dylana chick from Rockstar Supernova.

And she fit into L.A. Guns about as good as the Tuff singer fits into his old leather pants and hair extensions.

Fact is, he doesn’t.

Oh wait… should I be referring to myself here as he?

By now most of you have figured out, I am not really a writer.

Oh well…

With endless love and respect for Frankie Banali and the others, no one, including these guys will care what I say or think.

So I won’t say it, but rather type it instead.

For now, and as long as Quiet Riot may continue, there is no better guy for the job, than The Dark One.

I am not alone in this thought.

To those who bitch, moan and complain, well… it’s understood.

What else is there to do on Facebook, Twitter or the Metal Sludge Gossip Boards.

Frankie has missed some QR shows, Jerry Dixon recently missed some Warrant dates and obviously Don Dokken has missed singing at his shows for years.

Sure he shows up, but it’s more talking than singing.

Sadly Don’s singing voice has left long ago along with Vince Neil’s abs.

But to be fair, Don adds air drumming on the regular.

What?

Is that mean?

Are we shocked at some harsh criticism, or still surprised that the American Idol kid is no longer in Quiet Riot.

It’s like being perplexed when Sebastian Bach has a temper-tantrum. You know it’s only a matter of time, like when a 5 year old suddenly snaps over a toy.

I mean, what’s worse, Don talking the songs, or Vince belting out: “Wolf……night…..blood …..looks” while taped backgrounds blair through the speakers.

Like the arm-chair quarterback, you and everyone else reading this is… everybody knows what to do, how to do it and when it’s best.

Right?

You want a band with a stable singer, who can still hit all the notes? Then go watch FireHouse, Cj is an awesome performer.

But then we have to look at his “I Love you” posts to his girlfriend while they’re holding hands at Disney every other week plastered all over Facebook.

You want crazy? Go watch Donnie Vie videos, and let him know how great of a songwriter he is too. #snorefest

Note to Donnie: Elvis Costello called.

With that said, I have a stupid sense of humor – so this useless rant will seem like just that… to many of you, useless.

Be it Skid Row’s new singer, the Great White singer – or is he a tooth-paste model – anyway… you get the idea.

Everyone is trying to make it work.

Lynch Mob with Oni, without Oni, Oni is in, Oni is back out, Oni baloney… make up your fucking mind.

Even the ever wonderful Lies, Deceit & Treachery, those guys have had almost as many singers as they’ve played gigs.

I wonder how Phil Varone’s gofundmydocmentary thing is going?

Kids on my block have raised more money at their Lemonade Stand.

While we’re side-tracked and on drummers, where the fuck is Blotzer?

Anyone, Bueller, Bueller…

No matter what you, I, or the fence-post thinks, life will go on, and none of these guys will give a flying fuck about your opinion.

Or mine.

I can assure you.

James Durbin leaving Quiet Riot will be like Michael Grant being thrown from the L.A. Purple Rains. #byefelicia

Speaking of…

I can’t wait for L.A. Guns to announce a new member, it’s always fun to brain storm those headlines.

Again, I know this post is kinda weird right?

But hey, if you wanna read the cut & paste crap that other sites put in every article, feel free to read their posts.

I mean, how much sense can a guy make who once boasted; “I went Platinum, zero times!”

Oh yea, and just to be clear… Jizzy Pearl is back in Quiet Riot.