I have never seen… anything… so big in my life.”
— Kristie Kemper / QFM96 on BulletBoys‘ guitarist Mick Sweda‘s junk
July 15th 2026 — It’s not every day that a musician’s bulging junk is one of the most memorable things to happen at a rock show, but… it appears that is exactly what happened last weekend at the Picktown Palooza.
What in the Flock of Cocks are we talking about… ?
Well, we’ll try to explain… but it has to do with a certain rock guitarist’s pants, and what was blatantly creating a huge distraction inside of them… especially for the ladies.
Picktown Palooza is an annual Summer Festival that has been happening for a decade now in the small town of Pickerington just east of Columbus Ohio and the event is drawing more people and bigger bands each and every year.
This year the Picktown Palooza hosted a grip of killer acts including; Buckcherry, L.A. Guns, Dangerous Toys, BulletBoys, Enuff Z’Nuff, Rhino Bucket, Helix and Kingdome Come among others.
The event went off without a hitch and outside of a few raindrops, everyone from bands, to the fans and staff alike, all seemed to have an awesome time.
But… after the fact, the local Columbus radio outlet QFM96: WLVQ-96.3 decided to dissect the weekend’s festivities and part of their Monday morning show was discussing and describing in detail and trying to determine… what in the world was in BulletBoys guitarist Mick Sweda‘s pants?
Local on-air Dj Kristie Kemper and some female staff from the event all chimed in with their 2-cents about Mick‘s meat!
“I have never seen… anything… so big in my life” says Kemper with a blushing face but then adds, “I tried to make eye contact (motioning with her hands to look up) and I have never… it’s just huge. It was huge, HUGE!”
Picktown Palooza‘s social media account jumped at the chance to comment on the QFM96 Facebook reel adding; “Here at the Palooza we always say go BIG or go home…”
One female fan named Jill chimed as well writing: “Saw his “bullet boy” leading his way through the crowd a few weeks ago in Dayton!! Of course I snapped a few pictures!” (her image is shared at right)
Another female fan named Jeanie added: “I’ve seen one that big & I put my pants back on & ran.”
Big Ric from QFM96 interviewed Sweda at the event and chimed in with; “It was terrifying!”
Perhaps Mick should change his name to Dick?
Dick Sweda has a nice ring to it, especially when the band cranks out their hits like; “Smooth Up In Ya” and “Hard As A Rock.”
Metal Sludge have always been happy to give our readers what they really want… which is also why we created the World Famous Penis Chart back in the late 90’s… and believe it or not… that very page is still active >Right Here< and gets more hits on a regular basis than any article we’ve ever published.
So… what are you waiting for… go read it now, and feel free to share it with all of your friends!
In closing, we’d like to givePicktown Palooza, the fine folks over at QFM96 and all the awesome fans out there reading this a huge shout-out… hoping everyone is having an awesome summer.
Ready, Set, Palooza!
Stay tuned to Metal Sludge for more Breaking News, Updates and Features along with both New Interviews and Classic 20 Questions.
