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BLAS ELIAS IS SO STUPID….

 

BLAS ELIAS IS SO STUPID….


Welcome to the latest fad that will soon be spreading across the country like syphilis on Warrant’s tourbus. It’s called “Blas Elias Is So Stupid…” It’s kind of like the Your Momma game, also called Snaps. For example, Your Momma is so fat, she even weighs more than Vince Neil. That might not be funny, but it’s true. So anyways, this is called “Blas Elias Is So Stupid…” Let’s begin…

BLAS ELIAS IS SO STUPID, he auditioned for Shania Twain right before Tim Kelly died. He reportedly got the gig, but was talked out of it by Dana Strum!! How stupid is that? Let’s see, should I take a huge payday, have way more success than I ever had, and maybe get to bone Shania Twain, or should I stay in Slaughter, tour clubs, and be lucky to make $500 a week?
Shania Twain = Platinum records, #1 albums, radio play and arena tours
Slaughter = No record sales, albums not even allowed on the charts, no radio play, and club tours.
Good choice Blas!

BLAS ELIAS IS SO STUPID, he can’t even set up his own drumkit. If he didn’t have a roadie, he would be fucked.

BLAS ELIAS IS SO STUPID, he went to a drive in to see Closed For Winter

Don’t worry, more of Blas Elias Is So Stupid in coming weeks. If you have a Blas Is So Stupid story, send it to us! If you have a complaint, send it to trashbin@metal-sludge.com, and then send it to your mom cause I don’t need to hear it you little whinny bitch!

OZZY STILLBOURNE
Creating Fads

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