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Rewind with John Corabi, 3/23/00

 

METAL SLUDGE REWIND WITH…John Corabi
Union Singer John Corabi

We last talked to John on January 7th, 1999.  At the time it was our best 20 Questions we had done, and still to this day people still say it’s one of the best.  So how did John do this time around?  Well, we’ll let you decide.  
Check it out.

1.  What are you up to since we last talked to you?  What’s going on?
JOHN CORABI:  STILL SAVING UP FOR MY SEX CHANGE OPERATION…BETWEEN MY GIG MONEY AND THE MONEY I MAKE IN THE PARKING LOTS AT 7-11, I SHOULD BE A SPICE GIRL BY 2005

2.  If this new Union release bombs worse than the debut are you outta there or what?
I DON’T REALLY CARE EITHER WAY, I’M TOO BUSY CLINGING TO THE ILLUSION OF ROCK
STARDOM TO NOTICE

Union - 1998
Union – 1998

3.  Update our Sludgeaholics on any Crabby/Motley news?  Talked to Nikki lately, seen Mick wear any new wigs, etc…
TALKED TO NIKKI LATELY: YES
SEEN MICK WEAR ANY NEW WIGS: NO…BUT WHEN HE COMES OUT OF THE BAT CAVE I’LL LET YA KNOW

4. Lyrically, “Do Your Own Thing” is about people on the Union message board ripping on Gerri Miller.   Do you think that Metal Sludge is either directly or indirectly responsible for any of that, and if so, when do our royalty checks arrive?
“DO YOUR OWN THING” IS ABOUT PEOPLE NOT BEING SHEEP…YA KNOW, HAVING THEIR OWN OPINION AND OWN IDENTITIES- IT’S GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH METAL SLUDGE, SORRY…SO WHEN OUR ALBUM GOES “ALUMINUM” YOU WILL NOT BE RECEIVING A ROYALTY CHECK.

5.  Rate these un-stable singers on a scale of 1-10. 1 being somebody who needs their vocals cords ripped out with a rusty pair of pliers, and 10 being a fancy ass Mariah Carey type singer.  By the way, all of these guys either quit their band or got fired at one point.  Well, one guy just fired his whole band, but he’s still un-stable.

Vince Neil - 6
David Lee Roth – 6
Stephan Pearcy - 6
Sebastian Bach – 6
Jani Lane – 6
Phil Lewis – 6
Axl Rose – 6
Sammy Hagar – 6
Gary Cherone – 6
Jizzy Pearl – 6

SORRY…I JUST CAN’T GET NIKKI OFF MY MIND…..SIGH……

6.  Do you and Bruce allow Jamie Hunting or Brent Fitz to talk directly to you guys, or do they have to go through management?
JAMIE HUNTING?  BRENT FITZ?  NEVER HEARD OF THEM.

7.  For $25,000:  Tell Gerri Miller you want to ask her a personal question.  Sit her down, and in all seriousness, tell her that you want her to shave your scrotum for you because you are not comfortable doing it yourself.  You get paid regardless of whether or not she complies, as long as you never confess to getting paid.
SIGN ME UP!  I’LL DO ANYTHING FOR CASH…HAVEN’T YOU HEARD ALL OF THE TRIBUTE ALBUMS I’VE DONE?

8.  What’s the most overrated band today?
THE RUBBERBAND

9.  Do you feel a lot of pressure right now trying to outdo your last interview with us?
PRESSURE?!….UH…NO….NO PRESSURE…..WHY?…..DO I SEEM PRESSURED?! I’M NOT FEELING PRESSURED…I SWEAR…NOT AT ALL….REALLY….FUCK!!@#$%

10.  Rate these chicks on a scale of 1 to 10.  1 being a chick who needs a bag on her head, and 10 being a hottie.

Pamela Anderson - 6
Donna D’Errico – 6
Bobbie Brown – 6
Angleyne – 6
Robin Quivers – 6
Monica Lewinsky - 6
Christina Aguilera – 6
Brandi Brandt – 6
Lita Ford – 6
Carmen Electra – 6

11.  Update again on any Kulick/KISS news? Is Gene ignoring Bruce like a fan, does Paul want to suck you off, etc…
IS GENE IGNORING BRUCE LIKE A FAN: NO, BRUCE IS ACTUALLY GOING ON TOUR WITH THEM AS GENE’S BASS TECH….YOU HAVEN’T HEARD?  $250/WEEK PLUS PER DIEM DUDE…NOT BAD
DOES PAUL WANT TO SUCK YOU OFF: YOU KNOW HOW THOSE “THEATER DUDES” ARE…


John & Bruce worshipping Satan

12.  When you guys go out to promote this new record, how long do you think Bruce will last this time if the clubs all aren’t sold out?
DUDE, WE’RE NOT PLAYING IN CLUBS…WHERE DID YOU HEAR THAT?  WE’RE COMING TO A PHONE BOOTH NEAR YOU!!

13.  We know Union would probably be willing to play with anybody, because we’re sure you’re probably sick of always playing the Coconut Teaser.  But let’s pretend you had a choice and could pick the perfect tour lineup.  So out of these 15 bands, pick 4 you’d want to tour with.  Pick the bands in order they would play, from opener to Headliner, and include Union’s place somewhere in the lineup.

Motley Crue
Kiss
L.A. Guns
Slaughter
Warrant
Kid Rock
Marilyn Manson
Cinderella
Sebastian Bach
Quiet Riot
Poison
Megadeth
Pantera
Aerosmith
Godsmack

OPENER – KID ROCK
                   PANTERA
                   MOTLEY CRUE
                   AEROSMITH
                   UNION

14.  What the fuck is the cover of the new Union album all about??  Who’s idea was that?
THE MORAL OF THE COVER IS:  STAY AWAY FROM BROWN ACID


Layla – John’s chick

15.  What do you remember about the following years?

1975 = MY GIRLFRIEND WAS ONE
1979 = MY GIRLFRIEND WAS FIVE
1983 = MY GIRLFRIEND WAS NINE
1987 = MY GIRLFRIEND WAS THIRTEEN (RIPE FOR THE PICKIN’ – IF THERE’S HAIR ON THE FIELD, PLAY BALL!)
1991 = MY GIRLFRIEND WAS SEVENTEEN
1995 = MY GIRLFRIEND WAS TWENTY-ONE
1998 = MY GIRLFRIEND WAS HORIZONTAL AND MINE!!

16.  Where do you see Union a year from now?
A.  Headlining arenas and double platinum
B.  Headlining theaters and Gold
C.  Headlining clubs while Bruce cries like a bitch.
D.  Drunk and playing the Coconut Teaser on a Tuesday night.
I PREFER THE HARDER QUESTIONS GUYS…

17.  Other than yourself for writing a song about Gerri Miller, what rock star deserves a smack in the mouth?
THAT QUEER-ASS SINGER FROM THAT STUPID-ASS BAND, “ANGORA”…AND THAT DOUCHE BAG WANNA-BE SINGER FROM THAT BAND, “THE SCREAM”, AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST, THAT SORRY-ASS LOSER SINGER THAT RUINED MOTLEY CRUE’S CAREER…GOD! WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?!

18.  Pick one and why?
Riki Rachtman or Riki Lake = CUTTING EDGE T.V.
Beavis or Butthead = NEITHER…I’M INTO CELEBRITY DEATH MATCH, MYSELF…
Britney Fox or Britney Spears = BETTER HAIR
Hugh Hefner or Larry Flynt = I WOULDN’T MIND HANGIN’ WITH EITHER OF THEM…
Gene Simmons or Paul Stanley = ANYBODY THAT CAN COPYRIGHT A DOLLAR SIGN, AND FUCK SHANNON TWEED IS ALRIGHT IN MY BOOK
Paul Gargano or Gerri Miller = 6
Angora or The Scream = NEITHER…THEY BOTH BLOW

Angora
John in Angora

19.  How much do you lust for success?
A.  The new Union album goes Platinum but you have to cut off 2 fingers and bang your head against a brick wall until unconscious for it to happen;
Or,
B.  The new Union album sells 1000 copies, the tour flops, and you are forced to join a Trixter tribute band.
THAT’S A TRIBUTE I HAVEN’T DONE YET…COULD BE COOL…FUCK YEAH…

20.  Time for Metal Sludge’s Word Association.  We mention a name and you give us your thoughts.
Jizzy Pearl = MORE CRICKETS THAN FRIENDS
Tracii Guns = GOOD KISSER
Gene Simmons = SELL…SELL…SELL…
Dana Strum = RUDE, UNPLEASANT, AND NOT AS COOL AS HE THINKS HE IS (SORRY MARK)
Lars Ulrich = ONE OF MY SON’S FAVORITES
Tommy Lee = COCKZILLA!!
CC DeVille = DOES THIS GO TO 11?
Marilyn Manson = NICE TITS
Axl Rose = HOWARD HUGHES
Vince Neil = HOW DO I KNOW THAT NAME? IS HE THE GUY THAT SIGNS MY UNEMPLOYMENT CHECKS?
Limp Bizkit = YEAH…I LOVE THOSE GUYS!  THAT RECORD “FOLLOW THE LEADER” WAS THE BOMB!
Nikki Sixx = GREAT FRIEND, FATHER & SONGWRITER (YOU WERE EXPECTING A DIFFERENT ANSWER?) :-)

So there you have it.  Crabby did puss out on the Rate-A-Singer? and Rate-A-Chick?, so that’s disappointing, kind of like attendance at Union’s shows, but oh well.

You know what though, Union has been added to the Poison/Cinderella/Dokken/Slaughter tour, which is funny cause we just had Don Dokken say how much of a dick Dana Strum is, and we all know how Cinderella feels about Slaughter.  Now John just dissed Dana too, which means 3 out of the 4 bands Slaughter is playing with don’t like Dana.  Now if Poison would only talk some shit, we’d be all set! 

Anyway, for more info on Union, take your ass to www.unionasylum.com.  And be on the lookout for our HUGE 20 Questions with the bass player and the drummer from Union, whatever their names are.  Those should be up in May.

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