20 Questions With Darrell Roberts, 5/29/01

Tuff Guitarist Darrell Roberts

Recently we’ve had a few posts about Darrell because he got the WASP gig only to get the boot a few days later. To read about that, you can check out “Tuff Guitarist In WASP” and “WASP Guitarist In Tuff.” He originally said yes to 20 Questions a month ago, but once he got the WASP gig he didn’t respond to our emails as quickly as he had before. Of course once Blackie and company gave him the boot he was all back on our balls again. So we decided to give Darrell another shot and do 20 Questions with him. Enjoy!

1. What are you currently up to? This is your ONLY chance to plug your websites, bands, etc.
Rehearsing and getting ready to perform live on KNAC .com and preparing for the “History of Tuff” cd release party on June 1st. at Paladino’s in Tarzana Ca. The new Tuff single “American Hairband” is receiving a huge response including radio and press all over the U.S..Tour dates are in the works as we speak, and with a little luck it could be a very cool summer.I’m still doing the Metallica tribute band Alcoholica with shows in Vegas on June 2rd and Riki Rachtmans new Cathouse in July. I have also been writing alot and hope to put the finishing touches on my original blues project called “Snaggletooth”. For news and updates check the websites at www.tuffcds.com and www.alcoholicaweb.com

2. Alcoholica is a Metallica tribute band you play in. Somehow you guys got lucky and did the Napster tour. Tell us about how Fred & Limp Nutz treated you and did you smoke out with B-real and the Cypress Hill guys at all? Any good Fred Durst stories?
Last summer we (Alcoholica) was playing a show at Paladino’s when CAA (creative artist agency) showed up and asked to videotape us. They wouldn’t tell us what is was for,but we said sure,what the fuck. About two weeks later we get a call from our booking agent saying some shit about Napster and Limp Bizkit think it would be great to take you guys on tour and give the fans FREE Metallica! The next thing I know we were in Detroit Michigan in front of a capacity crowd, With Fred Durst, Mini Me and Tommy Lee standing on the side of the stage, opening up for Limp Bizkit and Cypress Hill playing Metallica covers. Sounds ridiculous but it’s true! The guys in Limp stayed kinda to themselves but were always real cool to us.The first night of the tour Fred even came out at like 7:00pm and introduced us. Very cool! We hung with Fred at some after parties and tittie bars and watched him play practical jokes. One day in Atlanta he paid two huge,hardcore crew members five grand a piece to hold hands and pretend to be gay lovers for a whole day.Without letting go of each others hands the whole day.It was fucking hilarious! Most of our partyin was done with Cypress. I’m not much of a smoker, but the drinking was legendary! Sen dog,B-real,Muggs,BoBo,Frank and Jeremy are some of the coolest people I’ve ever met! Hey Sen Dog and B, whenever your ready for those guitar tracks let me know.

3. Don’t you feel like an asshole for blowing us off because you got the WASP gig but then came back to us when you got the boot?
Hell NO! Look, I like this site alot. But if I have to choose between touring the world playing guitar in front of thousands of people making damn good money, and being put on your pussy list. Well the pussy list I’m going! And I don’t feel like I blew you off. I was right in the middle of something and wanted to see how it panned out. And that’s what I did.

4. Other than the band you’re playing in, what hard rock/heavy metal band should give it up and call it a day?
I assume your talking about Tuff? Tuff has three new members in the band that kick serious ass! (no offense to Stevie)but this is not the 1988 “poison wannabe”Tuff. It’s a whole new ballgame! We are also getting alot of attention from radio, press, internet etc. Without being on a label—That’s unheard of!

5. Rate the following guitarists on a scale of 1 to 10. 1 being a hack and 10 being a virtuoso.
Chris Holmes = playing 6 performing 10
Jorge DeSaint = 4
James Hetfield = 10 The best rhythm player EVER!
Randy Piper = ?
Keri Kelli = 7
Dave “The Snake” Sabo = 7
C.C. DeVille = playing 6 charisma 10
Wes Borland = Great fuckin tone dude!
Zakk Wylde = 10
Kirk Hammett = 6
Jason Hook = Never really paid attention but ya got to give him props for hangin with Mandi Moore. Lucky Bastard.
Dave Mustaine = I auditioned for them back in 1989. Dave is the real deal. 9
If ya don’t mind I’d like to add Stevie Ray Vaughn = 1000000 Guitar GOD!
Randy Rhoads = 100000+

6. Stevie Rachelle emailed us and said, “Blackie has now been getting some “serious” backlash about Chris Holmes not being in the band and why the guy from TUFF? Now after a few weeks, rehearsals, passports, plane tickets, etc… he has been told, “sorry dude it aint gonna workout”. How do you feel about getting the boot because the WASP fans didn’t want you in the band?
I think it’s narrow minded and FUCKED!

7. Any plans on joining any other played out bands like Krokus or maybe Raven in the coming months?
I don’t know, is McQueen Street lookin?

8. Have you seen Stevie with his hat off yet and if so, what exactly did you see?
Yes, I seen nothing! The glare was too damn bright! Of course i’ve seen his hat off. The other night we were at a club and Josie Pearl walks up and says–I want to see you with your hat off! I would not advise any males trying this, but Stevie took it off. Look, he’s got thin hair, it looks better with a hat—WHO GIVES A FUCK–move on!

9. So what was it like being in WASP for 20 minutes?
It was great! Hope to do it again sometime.

10. Rate the following chicks on a scale of 1 to 10. 1 being a mess and 10 being a hottie.
Pamela Anderson = 8
Britney Spears = 8
Bobbie Brown = 9
Gerri Miller = Her and Stevie are cool-I aint sayin SHIT!
Lita Ford = In the runaways a 10
Heather Locklear = 7
Kendra Jade = Something about her is really cute–7
Jennifer Lopez = Don’t want P-Diddy bustin a cap in my ass,so I’ll say a 7 but her ass is HUGE!
Donna D’Errico = 7
Tootie from the Facts Of Life = fuck yo mama.

11. Has Metallica sent any paperwork (lawsuit) over to Stevie about that song he ripped off called American Hairband?
Not yet. Maybe Kid Rock got them?

12. Other than yourself, which “rock star” deserves a smack in the mouth and why?
All of ‘em–Make up a reason.

13. What’s the difference between wearing makeup in Tuff and wearing makeup in WASP?
Never wore makeup in either.Never got that far. WASP is more like warpaint!

14. Do you know why Stet Howland puss’d out of doing 20 Questions and was Blackie behind him and you not doing them?
I can’t and would never speak for Stet or anybody else. For me to do any interviews in the position I was in would have been WAY premature.And still is,actually—what the fuck am I doin?

15. Has Darrell Roberts ever…
Touched another man’s penis = Fuck Off!
Been arrested = yes
Drove drunk = yes
Paid for sex = No.(unless a massage parlor-rub and tug counts).
Jacked off in traffic = several times
Shoplifted = yes,but not in years.
Had any object in your ass = A doctors finger once and it SUCKED! How does Alisha Klass do that shit? Considered suicide = Every time I turn on Mtv.
Shot heroin = Never even seen it.
Pissed your pants = No.

16. Was floating in a pool and pouring vodka over your head while your mother watched part of the audition for WASP?
Now that’s funny shit!

17. Which do you prefer:
WASP or Tuff = Old school-WASP. Today I dig’em both.
Limp Bizkit or Linkin Park = Limp
Brushing or flossing = brushing
“Blind In Texas” or “The All New Generation” = Blind in texas.
Jackass or Tom Green = Jackass
Mandy Moore or Britney Spears = Britney
Sucking cock or Getting fucked in the ass = Did you get my questions mixed up with Kendra Jades?
Lars Ulrich or James Hetfield = The almighty Hetfield.
Creeping Death Tribute Band or the Batter Tribute Band = I’ve never seen Battery but I gotta go with them for at least playing the correct instruments.
Blackie Lawless or Stevie Rachelle = Don’t really know Blackie. Been friends with Stevie for years.

18. Is your malnourished frame due to the fact that you’re a junkie or the Tuff salary does not accommodate food expenses?
That sounds like a question I’ve heard for years–from FAT people. I’ve never been into the drug thing. Wild Turkey is my drug of choice. It’s just metabolism and it sucks,But I guess it’s better than being fat and bloated. Hey Helena Handbasket, I’m a skinny,longhaired guitarist with no ass at all. We’re perfect! Send me an e-mail.

19. Word on the street has it you have a few teeth that are out of sync with the rest. Do you have a dental plan and is Jewel an influence of yours?
Yeah I got the Jewel fang goin on. I found that if I position my head at exactly the right angle, I can lick a girls clit and tickle her asshole with my fang at the same time. Chics dig it!

20. Time for Metal Sludge’s Word Association. We mention a name and you give us your thoughts.
Lars Ulrich = Rich –Talks to much,lets hear Hetfield for christ sake!
Fred Durst = Dude-call Napster, lets do it again.
Tommy Lee = Bein’skinny is not the only thing we have in common.
(Note From Sludge: Does that mean you also smack chicks?)
Creed = I would pay top dollar to see Fred Durst and Scott Stapp in the ring.
Kid Rock = Pure entertainment.
Jani Lane = Just met him in Cleveland and he was real cool. Thanks for the crown and coke.
Bret Michaels = Gets ALL the pussy!
Nikki Sixx = Legend.
Blackie Lawless = All around Badass Motherfucker. Unholy Terror Rocks!
Stevie Rachelle = Dedicated,hard working and has probably fucked your girlfriend!

Thanks aLot Metal Sludge and all you Sludgaholics, Also-BDM gives a shout out to the FBM!!
C-ya Darrell

Darrell’s the 1st person to do 20 Questions and request a date with our April Sludgette Helena Handbasket, so it’s good to see Darrell follows the page and must be a hardcore Sludgeaholic. He’s off our shit list.

For more info about Darrell and his projects you can go to www.tuffcds.com and www.alcoholicaweb.com.