Sludgeaholic Of The Month – October 2003, Jose Goyco

Jose Goyco

Jose sent us a variety of photos of himself wearing our swag and as you can tell, he’s a smooth, latin pimp! Enrique Iglesias and Ricky Martin ain’t got shit on Jose Goyco!

Congratulations to Jose for being our October 2003 Sludgeaholic Of The Month!

1. Where are you from and how old are you?
I am from the beautiful island of Puerto Rico, the un-official 51st state of the lovely American nation… now lemme stop teabagging the nation… :oP I am currently 28 years of age as I’m writin this and I’ll be 29 this next Friday (same b-day as Stevie Ray Vaughn and Tommy Lee)

2. Ambitions:
Well, I’ve pretty much accomplished what I’ve been set to do. I’m a simple man with simple needs. If anything, I’d like to have something music related, like a recording studio or some shit like that.

3. Turn-ons:
Hmmm… large hooters and big, plump asses!!! That, and a woman that can keep a conversation interesting for more then 5 minutes is a real turn on.

4. Turn-offs:
Women with bad hygene. If a woman always wear closed shoes and/or sandals, it’s an indication that she doesn’t like to show off her toenails, which means that if she doesn’t take care of her toenails, what can be said about her private parts? Also, women that listen to the opposite kind of music that I listen to. I’ll admit I’ll let it slide if a woman likes Backstreet Boys or X-Tina, but if she listen to rap en espa?ol, forget it! She can get to steppin’! Oh, and women that cheat and fool around and shit. I’m a player hater.

5. How long have you been coming to Metal Sludge?
Two, maybe three years. When was it that you posted the 20 Q’s on Anthony Focx? I first saw the site when those were up. I’ve been hooked since then.

6. Favorite bands:
Wow… Hard to pinpoint a list. I mean, if you take a look at my CD collection, you’ll find stuff from 311 to ZZ top and stuff in between like LL Cool J, Enya and MxPx. But if I’m going to say metal, top of my head are Metallica (yes, I love “St. Anger’ you player haters!), Megadeth, Anthrax, Faster Pussycat, Porcupine Tree, Ozzy, Black Sabbath, King’s X, Armored Saint, Mercyful Fate, Tesla, Def Leppard… whew! That’s a lot of shit for being top of my head, huh?

7. Least favorite bands:
Limp Bizkit… um… Linkin Park, I can tolerate, but I wouldn’t call myself a fan. Axl N’ Roses, as much as I like Buckethead, I can’t believe he went and joined them.

8. What do you do for a living?
I manage a local (read: mom-and-pop) record store in Aguadilla. If you look at a map of Puerto Rico, Aguadilla is located on the northwestern part of the island (the upper left corner of it). Since I’ve started and the changes in works that ‘ve had myself, I’ve been doing this on and off close to 15 years now.

9. At your job, do you sell more Shakira CDs or Poison CDs?
LOL!!!! Well, Latin music sells here a lot, being that we’re on a latin-speaking island (duh!), but you wouldn’t believe how much metal / hard rock we sell here. Release dates are Tuesdays, right? But we get merchandise on Saturday, so we can stock the store, make room for it, etcetera etcetera, and sometimes, we sell them so fast it feels like we didn’t recieved new music and shit. Oh, I should mention that I hate Shakira, but since that isn’t remotely close to rock, I didn’t included it on the list.

10. Have you ever banged an American chick, and if so, what’s the difference between banging an American broad and a Spanish mamacita?
I haven’t, but I fucked a Deustch woman. The difference is her being about a foot taller, grunts and curse in Deustch while having sex and that the Deustch woman wanted it up her as and I’ve only been with one woman that “let me” fuck up her ass. Maybe if I wasn’t Puertorrican, I’d get the women here to give me some ass, you know what I’m saying? ;o)

11. Being a sexy Latin lover, what are some of your moves you use when you want to get a chick in bed?
Bwahahahahaha!!!! I wouldn’t call myself a “latin lover” seeing how everyone here is latin, but I guess I usually try and make an ass out of myself, like poke fun out of me and being a smartass… at least, that’s what I try to. Contrary to what you might’ve seen in movies and soap operas, the Puertorrican woman isn’t that impressed by a local, but if someone say, from South America or the US does the exact same thing me or anyone else does to get into a woman’s pants, she’ll be all over said man like white on rice.

12. Do you get many concerts down in Puerto Rico?
NOT ENOUGH!!! We only have like one, maybe two shows a year. In 2000 it was the Maximun Rock Tour with Megadeth and Motley Crue, the next year was Baz and Vince Neil, and actually last year, the Rock Never Stop Tour was supposed to do a show here with Dokken and RATT, but the show was around the time when Dokken imploded and thus, we got no shows last year. Although this year have been pretty badass. This past saturday, for instance, Twisted Sister did a show here, and Anthrax is scheduled to do a show here on All Hallows Eve as part of their ‘Taking The Music Back’ Tour phase 2. For more info on it, please go to http://www.anthrax.com for more info on their tour. Also, in the coming weeks, Classic rockers Foreigner and Asia will be giving shows here, and there’s even talk that the G3 tour featuring Joe Satriani, Steve Vai and Yngwie “Fury Unleashed” Malmsteen. Hey, it’s not the OzzFest or the Summer Sanitarium, but with the few shows that come here, I’ll take whatever I can, you know?

13. You said you’ve worked in music related things for the last 13 years. What exactly is “music related things?”
I’ve been floor salesperson at a record store, I’ve been manager at a record store, I’ve been street teaming, I’ve done promotional work for labels… shit, I’ve even peformed with local bands! That si what I mean with “music related things.” Nothing obscure or gay to tell… sorry…

14. When was the last time you got laid?
Um… about two weeks ago. I won’t tell with whom, though. As we say here, “tu dices el milagro, y no el santo” which loosely translated means “you speak of the miracle, but not about the saint.”

15. How do you feel about being our October 2003 Sludgeaholic Of The Month?
How do I feel? HOW DO I FUCKIN’ FEEL?!?!?! You know, I celebrate my birthday this month, and fuck me blind, man!!! How in the hell did you guys knew I was going to celebrate my b-day this month and send in the questions, I honestly don’t know. All I gotta say is as soon as I saw the “Submission” subject on the e-mail, I went ape shit at the store. I started screaming and whooping and you know… looking all looney tunes and shit. But on the real, I feel really honoured that you decided that I was worthy of being a SOTM. Now I can say I’m equal to Soichi, David Weave Roth, Tollywood, Cracker, Boardmadd and Jim Bob Fuckin Dwarf!!!

16. Personal Motto:
“I regret nothing!”

I wanna thank you Sludge for giving me the best gift a man celebrating his eigtht anniversary of turning 21 can ever get. Stay metal!!! m/

If you’re an American chick and run into Jose, be sure to give him a piece of your American ass so he can sample some of our wonderful culture.

Congratulations and happy birthday to Jose!