Metal Sludge The Power and the Glory
20 QUESTIONS WITH…
The Little Kingz Scotty F Word
We had heard about The Little Kingz for a while, and when we finally found their website, we knew we had to share this group with the Sludgeaholics. Basically, they’re a group of rocking dwarfs! No shit. They’ve been featured in FHM Magazine as well as the new Ben Stiller movie Zoolander. And now their biggest break of all….20 Questions at Metal Sludge! So we sent out our questions to singer Scotty F Word, and here are the results. Enjoy!
1. No pun intended, but what are you guys up to? This is your only chance to plug your CDs, websites, tours, etc.
I’m towering at just about 4’7″ right now, thanks for asking. Our CD “Revolution” can’t be printed fast enough. The only way we sell them is at shows and on our web site http://www.thelittlekingz.com and it keeps selling out. I guess thats a good thing for us but a bad thing for all of the record company’s trying so desperately to get a hold of one of these gems (cough, cough) We’re in The movie, “ZOOLANDER” with Ben Stiller that is opening around the world on Sept. 28th. Everyone needs a little laughter in their lives right now and this movie will definetely give you that. We’re in the studio at the moment writing new songs. We’ve been playing all year at places ranging from The Court Tavern in New Brunswick NJ, CBGB’s in
NYC to RFK stadium in DC and LiveStock in Tampa FLA. Playing with tons of our favorite bands, like Staind, Linkin Park, Fuel, Disturbed, Offspring, 3 Doors Down, Live, Weezer and many others. How’s THAT forplugging?
2. Why is the word midget an insulting to word to little people? It seems at one time it was ok but now it’s often compared to calling someone black a nigger. Why is midget so offensive and how did that come about?
I’ll put it in simple terms. Besides it being like any other dorogitory name to describe ethnic backgrounds, What we have is a form of “Dwarfism”. Hence the name, “Dwarf”, which is what we are. What we don’t have is a form of “Midgetism”, there is no such thing, hence there is no such thing as calling a dwarf a Midget. Would I call you a can of sprite? No, because you are not. You’re Human, just like everyone else, and seeing that people don’t want to call us human (Imagine…) then call us what we are.
3. For those that don’t know, how did the 4 of you get together?
God, all of these questions require long answers. I apologies for that…No I don’t. Just sit there an read. I lived in Arizona, Steve and Karlton lived in DC, Paul Lived in Canada. Every year they have a convention for Little People in a different City in the US, just to let our hair down, party like nobody’s business or just meet new and interesting people. After My first convention, I moved to DC for a lovely lady I met at convention that lives there, and then met up with Karlton and Steve. Paul, after the next years convention, moved closer to us possibly for the same reasons I did. We’ve been in bands in the past, and knew the chances were good of a Little Person Rock band taking off for obvious reasons, and we dumped our average size former bands, and found the connection together. The Little Kingz were then formed.
4. What hard rock/heavy metal band should give it up and call it a day?
Besides the obvious (damn, second time I used that word), like REO Speedwagon, KISS, STYX, and anyone else on those fuckin’ ‘Can’t Stop Rockin’ tours, I would have to say, The Black Crowes. The reason is, they don’t know how to have fun at what they’re doing, and pussed out of a fight when Pauly, Me, and Jeff Keith from Tesla challenged them.
5. Yes or no, have you ever: Have you ever…
Tasted urine = Never accidently but on purpose a few times.
Touched another man’s penis = I’m not going to even touch that one.
Shot heroin = No, afraid of needles, but everything else dangerous and illegal, yes.
Considered suicide = On an acid trip once. Don’t do acid. Trust me.
Paid for sex = The girls pay me.
Felt taller than someone = On stage, I feel taller than everyone.
Walked under a turnstile = Absolutely, and you would too, if you could get away with it.
Gone down on a chick while standing up = I never kiss a girls pussy and tell…
Been chased down the street by a fat guy in his underwear = Ha Ha, thats a good one. No.
Punched somebody in the nuts = you bet. If these questions get any more ridiculous, the next set might be yours.
6. Do you guys play regular sized instruments and drums or do you have stuff specially made for you?
Drums are regular. My period is irregular, and our guitars are a bit smaller then average, but soup-ed up like the big boys play. We recently got a guitar endorsment that is currently building us guitars that fit us perfect, but I won’t tell who the guitar makers are, until the bastards pay up.
7. Do you have any hostility about bands like the Killer Dwarfs or The Dwarfs taking all the good Dwarf names and they’re not even Dwarfs!?
You took the words right out of our mouthes. We almost went with the band name, “The Tall People”.
8. Who are your biggest musical influences?
All of us have different ones, but range between, Staind, Disturbed, 311, Old Rage, STP, Alice, Crossbreed, and every top band we have played with.
9. What did you think about Blink 182 performing at last year’s MTV Awards with a variety of dwarfs?
I think it was fucking stupid.
10. Rate the following chicks on a scale of 1 to 10. 1 being a mess and 10 being a hottie.
Bridget The Midget = 1
The Olsen Twins = Not a chance
Britney Spears = 10
Carmen Electra = Me, 4 Karlton, 10+
Anna Kournikova = FUCKING 10!
Chyna = 1
Pamela Anderson = 8
Jenna Jameson = 8, if she fucks me, 10
Jennifer Lopez = 8
Lil Kim = 8, but her cans, 10
11. You guys played Livestock 2001 and the HFStival 2001 with a variety of bands. Who were the bands that were the coolest to you guys and did any bands treat you guys like dicks?
Staind, 3 Doors, Tesla, Disturbed, Linkin Park (let us use their drumset), Saliva, Stabbing Westward, all treated us very cool, and we partied with all of them. Black Crowes, were dicks. See above.
12. Do you guys have any health problems or is everybody basically normal?
Who’s normal now a days? We’re just fine, thank you for your deep concern.
13. Would you consider Hank The Angry Drunken Dwarf a good role model for other dwarfs?
No, but a role model of why you shouldn’t be an achoholic, yes. I respect all Little People. I just think he had too many issues in life that he had to deal with and delt with the wrong way. Poor bastard is dead now.
14. What rock star deserves a smack in the mouth and why?
David Lee Roth. Because he still thinks he is one.
| 15. Which do you prefer: Mini Me or Beatlejuice = Verne Troyer (Mini-Me) is a friend of ours, and will always get our pick. He’s an incredible dude. Opie or Anthony = Both are fine by us. High five a friend or Just wave at them = Flip them off. High urinals or Raised toilet seats = Bathroom sinks. Webster or Gary Coleman = Both are has beens before they every were one. Kareem Abdul Jabar or Shaquille O’Neal = Kareem. I’m often referred to as The Kareem Abdul Jabar of Little People. Warrant or Slaughter = What the fuck? Playboy or Penthouse = What ever one is not showing women pissing that month, is the one I get. Snow White & The Seven Dwarfs or The Keebler Elves = Seeing that I’m a little dopey, I would go for… Gnomes or Goblins = Gnomes Bloodhound Gang or Backstreet Boys = Bloodhound Gang |
 The Little Kingz with Tesla |
16. Have you ever been denied at an amusement park when trying to ride a roller coaster?
We all actually make the cut. Sorry to disappoint you.
17. How did you guys get hooked up with the Ben Stiller movie “Zoolander” and what are your roles? You probably play dwarfs, right?
Ben actually found our web site and got in contact with us. We play a Dwarf band from Finland. Love those hats…(see the movie, you’ll understand)
18. Do you curse God everyday for your size?
I curse god for giving me such a large penis. My hands aren’t big enough to get around the bastard.
19. When it rains are you the last to know?
So many out of work comedians…
20. Time for Metal Sludge’s Word Association. We mention a name and you give us your thoughts.
Dee Snider = Get a new hairstyle
Gene Simmons = Whore. (knows how to get a buck) My Manager loves him.
Joe C = He will be missed.
Ben Stiller = I can’t say enough good things about him.
Poison = Come on now…
Randy Newman = FUCK YOU YOU SLIMY NO TALENT SEMEN DRIPPING DEUTCHEBAG!!!
Nikki Sixx = Know where I can get the ‘good’ stuff, dude?
Marilyn Manson = Completely Original.
Lars Ulrich = (Not even worth a word written about him).
Howard Stern = He backed down (The Losers) from a challenge from The Little Kingz. He will be ever known as the guy that gave up to a bunch of Dwarves. I do love his show, and can’t wait for the day I get interviewed by Studdering John. You’re a good interviewer though.
Now how can you not love an interview like that?
So now that you’ve read the 20 Questions, go buy the CD at www.thelittlekingz.com
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