Steve Lauxes age 21 – My apartment in Oshkosh Wisconin – Saturday June 20th 1987 – Photo By: Me
“39 years ago, I was headed to Midway Airport in Chicago with a 1-way ticket in hand… that I had bought just 72 hours earlier.”
— Stevie Rachelle / Tuff
June 25th 1987 — Today is a special day for me, and I decided to share this story with the readers here at Metal Sludge.
I’d like to thank everyone for reading this web-site for nearly 30 years, following my musical journey for even longer and supporting my related projects.
It’s kind of crazy to me that it’s 2026, I am 60 years old, and somehow this music thing is still a major part of my life.
I am beyond grateful and forever indebted to all of those who have believed along the way.
With that… I’d like to share the following… which I wrote earlier today.
Ready, Set, Anniversary!
Hello Thursday June 25th,
I am glad to see you again; it’s been a while.
Today is not a Holiday, and likely not a day that many consider important… but to me this exact date – including the day of the week – has a significant meaning.
Just for texture, June 25th has fallen on a Thursday just 5 times in the last 40+ years.
As a young boy growing up in Oshkosh Wisconsin I day-dreamed of California, not sure why, but I did… and from a very young age.
Perhaps it was The Mamas & The Papas, The Beach Boys and The Eagles who all had become some of my earliest AM Radio memories, all of which also released music that at some point focused on or heavily referenced life in California.
Not forgetting the shear fact that I was absolutely obsessed with Skateboarding as a kid in the mid 1970’s before my age even had a second digit.
My world revolved around Skateboarding and Skateboard magazines where I would read about the sport’s biggest stars; Tony Alva, Stacy Peralta, Jay Adams, Ty Page and others… all from California.
Those magazines showcased their skills riding in every perfect pool, killer backyard ramp or cement skatepark filled with obstacles and bowls… most of which were located in… you guessed it, California.
Soon my friends and I were building our own ramps, although early-on they were shotty at best, but any piece of scrap wood and some 2×4’s would do… as long as we could skate it.
As I type this, “California Dreamin’” is playing in the background and as I glance out my window I see a hazy morning sky that will slowly give-way to pure blue before lunch… all the while Palm Trees stand tall outside that same window.
Is it ironic that “California Dreamin’” was released a short time prior to my actual birth, and on the day I was born – March 2nd 1966 – the song was sitting near the top of the Billboard charts.
I was honestly in love with California as a kid… and everything about it… even though I had never been there.
As life unfolded for me more than 2,000 miles away from my future home, it was always on my mind… and Golden State sprinkles constantly reminded me of a world that seemed more like a fantasy than a reality… especially during the cold bitter winter living on the western shores of Lake Winnebago.
I longed for California so bad, that I truly believe I suffered some level of depression along the way, especially walking to school in 2 feet of snow and knowing all too well, that I could not ride my skateboard until spring.
Then… when I least expected them… more sprinkles appeared and they always brought me joy.
I remember seeing a car driving down the street in Oshkosh one afternoon with that distinctive Blue with Yellow lettering license plate… and I thought, “Wow… they’re from California”, that alone would bring a smile to my face.
I know this seems minuscule to others, but to me it’s a vivid memory from more than a half-century earlier.
After school I would watch ‘CHiPs’ religiously… of course the show was filmed in California and the CHP in the show’s name stands for California Highway Patrol.
This show was an outlet for me watching all things located in California on my T.V. several days a week, and the episode that featured the ‘Skatercross’ Skatepark in Reseda had me more than mesmerized.
Skateboarding of course was birthed in California and my infatuation with a piece of wood that had wheels on it brought me other interests, like the bands we’d listen to while skating, and many of them started out on the West Coast… J.F.A. comes to mind, and this band was one of my earliest live (club) concert experiences before I found Heavy Metal in my late teens.
Which leads me to the next obsession I had growing up… music and eventually joining a band.
I was already in my final year at Oshkosh West High when I first discovered Motley Crue, Ratt, Dokken, Black N’ Blue, Armored Saint and W.A.S.P., along with a list of other metal bands.
I soon learned that most of my new favorite groups were also coming from California… more pin pointed… they were all a product of the Sunset Strip.
By 1984 my infatuation with California grew ten-fold.
Then shortly after graduating High School I started jamming with guys and by the spring of 1985 I played my first official live show with X-iter.
Reading about all these bands in the magazines I would see the same club names popping up, places like; “Whisky-A-Go-Go”, “The Roxy”, “Troubadour”, “The Palace” and the “Santa Monica Civic Center”... once again, this stuff had me enthralled with this far away never-never land that I wanted to go visit… so bad!
In 1986 I was 20 years old, playing in a band and working at a water-bed factory with my shift starting at 7:00am Monday through Friday… it was in a warehouse and in the dead of winter it was freezing.
It was so cold I had to wear multiple layers of thermal clothes, huge thick flannels and a ski-beanie, often wearing gloves as well which made using the tools that much harder to grip.
I also had a little space heater near my work station and transistor radio that was tuned to whatever station came in with the least amount of static.
I vividly recall one morning before our 10:00am fifteen-minute break that song came on once again… “California Dreamin’” started to play and I just stopped and listened… I literally just stared into space as the lyrics sprinkled from the tiny speakers…
“I’d be safe and warm (I’d be safe and warm)
If I was in LA (if I was in LA)
California dreamin’ (California dreamin’)
On such a winter’s day”
Then no sooner did I stop to listen, the sound of table-saw kicked in and I snapped out it… quickly back to work with my air-gun stapler fastening leather, suede and padding to the various 4, 6 and 8 foot long rails.
At some point one morning I went on break and sat with my work partner Tony and a few others… most of them dragged off a cigarette as I sipped a hot chocolate and told myself, “I need to get out of here.”
I was determined… I was focused, and I was going to California… but how and when?
Honestly, I didn’t know the answer… but… little did I know, the answer was somehow evolving all on its own.
I was destined to go to Cali and as fate would have it… there were 3 guys from Phoenix living in an apartment in Van Nuys, and they too were trying to figure out their next move… just like I was.
You see, these guys were in a band, and they had parted-ways with their singer… and to try to fill that spot, they made a couple of flyers and handed them out on the Sunset Strip.
It was the 1980’s and they were smack dab in the middle of what could easily be described as one of the most important, yet over-saturated periods in music history.
There were easily hundreds, perhaps a few thousands bands, and realistically tens of thousands of individaul dreamers… all pursuing fame… on the streets of tinseltown.
But, as fate would have it… the puzzle eventually aligned… even though the pieces were nowhere near each other.
Somehow 1 of those flyers – a piece of pink paper – made its way over 2,000 miles back to Oshkosh.
A friend of mine from High School named Al was a drummer, and he had just taken a trip to Hollywood himself and when he returned, he called me to tell me all about it.
It was Friday June 19th, and that afternoon Al invited me over and I went straight away, I could not wait to hear what he experienced.
Al was full of excitement describing in detail how he saw David Lee Roth at the “Rainbow Bar & Grill” and I recall him saying how big his limousine was… remember, we’re from Oshkosh – there are not a lot of limos in our little town – so it was super interesting hearing this, and he continued talking about going to various clubs sharing what he saw and I was just soaking it all up.
He then said; “Check these out”, as he handed me a huge stack of magazines, flyers, ticket-stubs and more.
It was stuff likeBAM Magazine, the L.A. Weekly and the flyers were insane… big logos, bright colors, catchy slogans and crazy names like; Reinkus Tide, The Zeros, 22 Ski-Doo, Hit N’ Run, Serious Pleasure, Leatherwolf and Tuff.
But… the Tuff flyer stood out… big time.
This pink faded wrinkled flyer pictured below, is the exact one Al handed me that afternoon… little did I know at the exact moment, that this piece of paper was the missing piece to the puzzle that I needed; to make my trip to California a reality… and now nothing was going to stop me.
There were 4 squares across the flyer, with Todd (Bass), Michael (Drums) and Jorge (Guitars), but there was 1 empty square in the middle of the page… waiting for their new singer’s photo.
FRONTMAN WANTED. The Baddest, Most Outrageous, Pretty Boy in Town! Pro’s Only. So if You Got What It Takes. WE WANT YOU – WE WANT YOU – WE WANT YOU! Prefer Blondes, Influences; Robin Zander, Billy Idol, Bon Jovi, Tom Keifer, David Lee Roth, Bret Michaels.
Those words were the exact notes stamped into the empty singer square.
This is the ‘Singer Wanted’ TUFF flyer that made its way back to Oshkosh from California / June 1987.
I asked Al; “Can I have this flyer?”
He obliged and told me; “Sure, take all of it”, and offered me the other flyers as well.
I drove home that night and started planning…
I literally told myself; “This is my chance!” and excitement was running through my veins.
Saturday I woke up and at some point called the number listed and spoke to a woman on the phone… it was ‘Rocking Horse Studios’ who were taking messages for the band as their phone number had been disconnected at their apartment… shocking right?
In so many words, she told me; “You need to send a package with your Demo Tape, Head Shots and anything else you feel might be of interest, Reviews and Press Clippings.”
She then gave me an address in Canoga Park California and I hung up the phone.
That afternoon I took a little disposable Kodak camera I had, got showered, put on some of my cool clothes, sprayed my hair up, threw on my cool sun glasses and did some selfies in my apartment.
I immediately took the camera to the 1-hour photo mat, then back to my pad and started to rifle through my stuff… I was looking for a few demo tapes and was anxiously waiting to rush back to the photo place and grab the pictures.
After a few short hours I sat with the photos and a Memorex tape or two… but I was not thrilled with my assets, so I quickly told myself, “F#@k this package… I am not sending anything.”
I came to the realization that my demo was average at best, the photos didn’t do me justice, and for what it’s worth, I could admit that my stuff was not the greatest representation of who I am, or what I was capable of.
I wasn’t going to let a couple of 3×5 photos and a used cassette tape decide for me.
So… I made up my mind on the spot.
My very first move was to put the garden hose into the drainage nozzle on my water bed mattress, then run the hose into the shower and I threw a bunch of books, clothes and other items onto the mattress to start forcing the water out to drain this pile of boards that I built a year earlier at work.
Next move… I filled my 1976 Ford LTD 4-door with as much of my stuff as I could, and drove it to my Mom’s house across town.
I pulled in the driveway and started unloading my possessions into the basement when my Mom asked; “What are you doing?”
I simply said; “I’m moving to California…”
That weekend I moved 95% of everything I owned back into her basement and I was just days away from a lifelong dream becoming a reality.
So… on Monday June 22nd 1987, I woke up as the decision was already made… I am going to California… and I had a reason to go, and a goal to meet.
There was this band in California looking for their new singer… and I told myself, “That’s my gig!”
That same Monday afternoon I drove down-town and walked into the Oshkosh Travel Agency… it’s a small place, there was 1 lady working there and I told her; “I want to fly to Los Angeles California”… then she started asking questions.
“When do you wanna go?”
I answered, “As soon as I can…” and she replied with, “Like tomorrow?” I said, “Not tomorrow, I need a few more days…” then she asked, “How about Thursday?”, and I replied, “Fine.”
A bit of back n’ forth, and she told me the cheapest ticket was out of Midway Airport in Chicago and then started to ask, “When do you want to return?”
“I’m not coming back…” she added, “So… 1-way?” and I nodded my head, “Yes.”
A few minutes later she told me it was $106.00 and I paid her.
She printed out the little carbon airline ticket (I still have the receipt somewhere), departing Midway Field 3 days later on that Thursday.
That day and date was Thursday June 25th 1987 and my flight was in the afternoon.
Over the next 48 hours I finished moving all of my possessions out of my apartment, told my 2 female College room-mates I am moving and gave my immediate notice at my job… matter of fact, I think I had 2 jobs at the time, but either way, I told everyone I am bailing.
On this day, 39 years ago, my friend Sam drove me 3 hours to Midway Airport in Chicago with a 1-way ticket in hand.
When I landed at LAX, I had $140.00 in cash, 1 suitcase, a straw cowboy hat, a full head of blond hair, my stage name was Lauxes and I also brought something else…
A big pair of balls and more confidence than anyone – in any room.
It’s now 39 years later, and everything I left with no longer exists, including that silly stage name and my hair, ugh.
My stage name was Lauxes, which is Sexual spelled backwards… the guys in Tuff did not approve that, so I had to come up with a new one. Lol.
But, I still have those same big balls and I’ve never lacked confidence… ever.
I landed in the early evening at LAX and my friend Pam from Milwaukee was nice enough to pick me up, she also offered to let me stay at her place until I got myself sorted… well, in reality, I asked her if I could stay with her and she agreed.
Quickly we were on the 405-freeway headed North into the San Fernando Valley – Van Nuys to be exact and more detailed – to her apartment on Sherman Way just East of Sepulveda Boulevard.
And no… I could not pronounce Sep-ul-ve-da to save my life, at least not the first few weeks I was here.
Let me also make note here… I love Wisconsin and I loved (most of) my youth… but like a relationship, I guess I felt it was time for me to cut the cord and move on.
Today now marks 39 years living in California, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
Sure, the cost of living is high, and like any place, there are good and bad points, highs and lows, pluses and minuses too… but… no matter how you slice it… I was born to be in California.
And for what it’s worth, I will die in California too!
When?
Nobody knows, but God willing I have a few more year left.
I am so happy for today, and even more grateful for all of the opportunities I have been afforded since moving to California.
Lastly… there are so many people to thank, and I could never do the full list justice, so with that, I thank everyone… but most importantly, I want to thank – Todd, Michael and Jorge – without you 3, who knows what would have happened.
Thank you for reading, and always chase your dreams.
Stevie Rachelle
NOTE: The TUFF DIARIES are all shared below… if you haven’t read them previously… they tell most of the story in greater detail spanning most of the decade after I joined Tuff. Check them out below.
This was our first ever photo-shoot in July 1987 / Photo By: Gene Kirkland
Stay tuned to Metal Sludge for more Breaking News, Updates and Features along with both New Interviews and Classic 20 Questions.
TUFF Diaries #1 – #18 are all linked below!
Entry #1 How I Made My Way To California, 31 Years Ago Today (June 25th 2018)
Entry #2 My First Meeting With Tuff, “Is That All Your Real Hair?” (June 29th 2018)
Entry #3 Tuff audition, Jim Gillette screams, a near fist fight & our debut show (July 5th 2018)
Entry #4 The Metal Years, Famous People, Cocaine, Kiss & Sex with a Miss Gazzarri’s Dancer (July 14th 2018)
Entry #5 Guns N’ Roses, Del James, 1988, Sound City, Strippers, Crabs & You’re Fired! (July 30th 2018)
Entry #6 Summer on Sunset, Vinnie’s Invasion, Tracii’s Glue Gun, Vain & Sex by a Dumpster (August 11th 2018)
Entry #7 MTV’s NYE Big Bash, Riki & Taime’s Cathouse & My Girlfriend was a Poster at Spencer’s (August 20th 2018)
Entry #8 Jon Bon Jovi, Sebastian Bach, Rick Rubin, Howie Hubberman, BulletBoys & Gazzarri’s (Sept. 16th 2018)
Entry #9 Summer Tour ’89, Andy McCoy, Def Leftovers, Max the Model, Z-Rock, Tommi Gunn & Lit (Oct. 10th 2018)
Entry #10 G’bye 1989, Jessica Hahn, Skid Row, Martha Quinn, Young Gunns, Flyer War & Cock-Rings (Nov. 9th 2018)
Entry #11 Hello 1990, Texas, Britny Fox Tour, Strippers, Hells Angels and Atlantic Records signs Tuff (March 24th 2019)
Entry #12 Ready to Record, Howard Benson, FM Station, Jani Lane, Court & my 1st Playmate (June 2nd 2019)
Entry #13 Recording Atlantic debut, Bret Michaels, Kane Roberts & Sex is fine, but no sleepovers (Aug. 27th 2019)
Entry #14 New York City, Mixing our Record, Publishing Deal, Video Shoot , Cherry St. & Tigertailz (March 25th 2020)
Entry #15 MTV, The Nelsons, Jason Newsted, U.S. Summer Tour, London & our Stolen Ryder Truck (May 19th 2020)
Entry #16 Lita Ford, Jason Flom, 75+ Shows, Cocaine, a Lawsuit, Sweet F.A. & the Freeway Fight (July 29th 2020)
Entry #17 Hello 1992, Gene Simmons, More Money, Mike Starr, a New Bassist & Jason Flom II (March 20th 2021)
Entry #18 WildSide, Dee Snider, Tour Drama, Baywatch, New Label Search and Living in Reseda (Aug. 21 2021)
Entry #19 Michael Resigns, River Phoenix, Thirsty Whale, He’s Got a Gun, Stolen Van & Danny Quits (Jan. 16th 2022)
Entry #20 1994, Northridge Earthquake, Kurt Cobain, RLS Records, releasing “Fist First” (May 2022)
Entry #21 “Fist First” Tour, Making F#@king Videos, Building Bunk Beds & O.J. Simpson (Dec. 2022)
Entry #22 1994 TBA
Entry #23 1995 TBA
Entry #24 1995 TBA
Entry #25 1995 TBA
Bonus Entry – RIP … Metal Sludge’s World Famous Gossip Board Dead at 27 (Sept. 2025)
Bonus Entry – TUFF singer Stevie Rachelle Shares Director’s Concept for MTV Video “I Hate Kissing You Goodbye”, explains why a Ballad was Picked First (June 2025)
Bonus Entry – SO MANY SEASONS – “What If, 42 Years Later” a True Story of Tragedy & Triumph (2021)
Bonus Entry – HAPPY BIRTHDAY … Metal Sludge Was Born 25 Years Ago on September 1st 1998 & Here Is How
TUFF DIARIES Entries #22 through #25 coming soon…..
If you want to Donate to support TUFF DIARIES, please know that I Thank You!
Tuff @ WebSite – Facebook – eBay – Amazon – iTunes – Instagram – X/Twitter – Store – Discogs – YouTube –
Stevie Rachelle @ Intsagram – Facebook – X/Twitter – Metal Sludge – Donate – Store – Reverbnation –
